You never know what you're going to get. This phrase is not only true for chocolates, but also for first dates, even second and third dates. At its best, dating is a delightful interlude when you get to know everything about a person, including their past lives. Wait... From MLM schemes to creepy doll collections, we asked people from around the world to share their weirdest date stories.
30. You're on Candid Camera!
Went out with a girl for a first date. She took me to a Kumdo lesson, which is a Korean sword fighting sport. I thought that was cool, but it was an advanced class and I made somewhat of a fool of myself but all in good fun. Anyway it turned out that she was bringing me there because she wanted me to be part of a documentary about foreigners in Korea. So my looking like a fool was broadcast nationwide. We then visited the grandmaster's house for makeolli and the film crew started interviewing me. They were basically focusing on my relationship with the girl I was going out with. They didn't seem to understand it was a first date. So here I am trying to answer awkward questions without embarrassing both of us on national television.
29. Never look back.
I had this major crush on this girl. She was goth-ish which isn't my thing normally but this woman was extremely intelligent and cool. So the first date is good, we have a good time, we're both tipsy and we go back to my place. Mind you she's very open. So things get hot and heavy. Right when the action is going to start she says "I don't actually want to do this." Imagine a semi-truck slamming on its brakes. "Okay," I say "that's fine" and we just sleep off our drinks.
This exact same thing happens a second time and I'm starting to get annoyed only because it's painfully obvious that our mutual actions during the date are leading to something. Finally it happens a third time and I decide I'm over this girl. About a year later I find out from her friend that she was hoping I would "act" out a nonconsensual fantasy with her. I then found out she had herpes. So in the end, ME FOR THE WIN!!
28. Have you heard the bad news?
On my first date with a guy off an internet dating site, he took us to the Scientology museum in London. I thought "Hmmm, original, easy to find things to talk about/ laugh at the craziness of, this could be fun."
Then he proceeded to read every, single, piece of writing on every, single exhibit, ask the attendant very probing questions about how one goes about joining scientology etc. etc. and sounding slightly too interested to just be intrigued about a religion. Also he was visibly sweating.
Once we were done there we went for a glass of wine and then I was out of there like a shot.
27. This is not how you impress someone.
In college this guy from one of my classes asked me to go out with him out of the blue (we'd never even talked before) but he was pretty cute so I said sure. We exchanged numbers and he said he'd call me with details. He called the next day and told me we were going to a resturaunt that was WAY out of my price range. We're talking like no way will this bill be under $100.
I tried talking him out of it and when that didn't work flat out saying I couldn't afford something like that but he insists and tells me not to worry (this all really should have been a clue to me). So I say fine and agree to go. We get to the resturaunt and the waiter comes over and I go to order (the cheapest thing on the menu) when he stops me and says "Ignore her, we're both having the steak." "But I don't like steak." "She's just saying that because she's poor. We'll have steak." and shoos the waiter away.
I'm mortified and want to leave but he was my ride. He tries to make conversation and just proves to me that he really is a jerk. Then he says he has to go to the bathroom and leaves. I'm sitting there for a good 10 min. before he text me "Hahaha I got diarrhea from drinking too much last night don't eat without me." That was the last straw. I call the waiter over, pay for my meal, and go to the Starbucks down the street to call my friend to pick me up.
26. Not really into that kind of thing.
There's been a few but the absolute worst and weirdest was the woman who turned up to the pub with literally no money, expecting me to buy her drinks and dinner. I wouldn't have minded if she'd have told me beforehand but this was completely out of the blue.
So anyway, we sat there making awkward conversation, or at least I tried to start a conversation, told her about my life, asked her questions. She was too busy texting and phoning her friends to really take notice.
So eventually we did get talking, and then out of nowhere, she told me that she killed her dog. Not accidentally either. I just upped and left and avoided all contact. That was 2 years ago.
25. Thanks but no thanks.
After my freshman year of college I met a guy on OK Cupid and we went to get dinner at Friday's as our first date. He offered to give me a ride, but I said no. He was a couple years older, well dressed and started talking about how he'd started his own business after college and it was going well. Good for him! Bragging a bit but hey that's an accomplishment.
So after we order he says "Let's play a game. We'll each take out our wallets and compare what's in them." Wasn't a joke, literally started showing me his credit cards and bragging about the high limits, ending with "Clearly you can't afford to pay for this dinner, but don't worry I can cover you." I was annoyed and protested but he wouldn't take no for an answer.
So as we leave he says he wants to show me his car. Unfortunately it was before mine in the lot so I had to walk by it. It was a white, windowless serial killer van. He begged me to sleep with him in it, right there in the Friday's parking lot.
I was pretty glad I drove separately.
24. This fish smells funny.
I met a guy online who seemed really nice. We exchanged a few emails and got along well enough, so we decided to meet up for a matinee. We exchanged pics so that we could ID each other at the theater where we were meeting.
I show up, expecting to see the heavy-set dude around my age because that's what his profile (and pic) said. Instead, he was about 20 years older and 100 lbs heavier than his picture. I am a fairly open-minded person when it comes to dating, and I know that many folks embellish, but c'mon!
We watched our movie in silence, and politely parted ways.
Pixabay
23. Girl's date gone wild.
When I was young and stupid I dated a guy with a temper. He would get mad about something stupid like saying goodbye too quickly on the phone, pick a fight and we'd break up. He would call a day or two later and we would make up. After a few months I had figured out the cycle and I was fed up. So, when he picked a fight as usual I ended it and then didn't take him back.
While we were dating I had become close with his sisters and his mom loved me. We had scheduled a girls lunch and his sister begged me to go. I finally said yes and went. Everything was fine and I had a great time. The whole lunch was probably 2 hours long. At the end I walked to their car with them and the mom grabbed me and said, "Hear him out!"
Out of the car comes her son who was trying to explain to me why we should be together. I just walked past him to my car as he ran after me. He ended up picking a fight with me because "it was my fault we broke up and I didn't even call him so he could fix it." Then he threw rocks at my car as I drove away. I wish I had a picture of what my face looked like when he came out of that car. I never spoke to him again and never accepted another invitation from his family.
22. The two are unrelated, hopefully.
When I was a freshman in high school, I dated a guy for two weeks. My parents were really excited and wanted to meet him, so they took us (the whole family, me, and my boyfriend) to a Johnny Cash impersonator playing in our town's theatre, and then to dinner at Shari's.
The audience was almost entirely old people, and at the time it was so awkward. We broke up after two weeks. A year later, I came out as a lesbian. He is studying fashion design in Italy, last time I checked.
21. Squeaky clean.
I think it was about my fifth date with this guy, in passing on our fourth date I had mentioned something about my flat not having a full-sized bath tub. For our fifth date I had agreed to a pizza and movies night at his place. The night was going okay, he was a little bit overly affectionate (always having to hold my hand, etc) and then he told me he had to quickly do something in the other end of his house.
About 20 minutes later he comes back and tells me to follow him to the bathroom.. He has drawn me a bath, lit candles and clashing scents of aroma oils filled my nostrils. I know that it was in theory a nice gesture but I felt completely panicked. To me, it was a very full-on act so early in a courtship. Anyway I had to get in, (he left the room) and I sat there awkwardly in this bath for 15 minutes and wanted to die the whole time.
20. Amateur masseuse.
A guy I worked with kept asking me out, I continuously said no. After about a year, I started to feel bad for the guy and said yes to a date. He asked me to lunch so I figured it could be a quick easy "date." He picked me and took me to Wendy's...where he made me order off the dollar menu...and I could only get two things. After this very quiet lunch where he hunkered over his chicken nuggets like I would steal them he said he needed to stop at Walmart. We go in and he heads to the lotion section. Strange, but whatevs. He then grabs two scented lotions and asks which one I like better. Being nice I pick one, and he responds with "great! I'll use this for your massage!" Luckily I had to work in two hours and told him the massage would have to wait. I spent the next three months trying to avoid him until he quit.
19. Awwwwkward.
I'd met a really nice guy near where I work. We went for coffee during the week. Everything seemed to move along great. He invited me to dinner on a Sunday. He picked me up, and we went to a nice place. We had just got our menus when his wife showed up. I had no idea he was married. It wasn't like divorced, or separated, or anything like that. She went off on him right there in the middle of the restaurant. I've never been so embarrassed. I just walked outside and called my sister to pick me up.
18. Joan of Arc lives again.
Everything had been smooth sailing so far, no odd stares or pauses, I was really digging this chick. We start talking about our upbringings and we get to church and religion. I tell her I went to Catholic church, but was more of an atheist by then. She says "Oh, I hate the Catholic Church." I asked why. "Oh, they killed my husband!" "Wha- wha- what?" (keep in mind, we're both about 16). "Oh yes, they sent him off to Israel during the Second Crusade to atone for a sin he didn't even really commit." I thought about asking some follow up questions and then decided that I was not ready to deal with the life baggage of most 16 year old girls, much less the baggage from previous lives.
Pixabay
17. It's art therapy.
She invited me to her place where she began smashing mirrors with a ball peen hammer for some crafty therapeutic mosaic she was working on. After a call and argument with the downstairs neighbors, the cops arrived. One cop took me aside and said "We get calls about this lady all the time. You may want to reconsider hanging out with her."
Photo by Sharon McCutcheon from Pexels
16. Four-letter word, starts with J.
I went out for coffee with a classmate. He showed up half an hour late wearing baggy sweatpants with suspicious stains all over them. I had been amusing myself by doing the crossword while waiting on this guy, and when he arrived, he sat down and pulled my crossword over to him. He looked at it for a moment and then said, "Women who read are fine and all, but it isn't very attractive to show off."
We did not have a second date.
15. What else did they say about me?
Dated a woman who didn't tell me she needed meds because she was psychotic. In the middle of dinner (at a restaurant) she got quiet and distracted. I asked if she was feeling okay. Apparently one of the voices told her I was a horrible person and she pulled a steak knife on me.
A customer was able to talk to her, and got her to put the knife down. The police were called, and she was arrested. I didn't press charges, and about a week later, she sent me a letter with proof that she's been in counseling for a long time, takes medication, and included a heart felt apology.
David Garrison on Pexels
14. Well, actually...
Dated a man who corrected my Polish, because his grandmother was Polish and she told him how to pronounce some words.
Mind you, I was brought up in Poland, went to school and college there, read a zillion books, saw a zillion Polish movies etc. But this guy was very condescending about my pronunciation of the few words he learnt from his grandma.
Image by pikabum from Pixabay
13. There's nothing bunny about it.
So I was 18, in the Air Force, and living in the dorms. My roommate set me up with his girlfriend's cousin, and the four of us went to a movie.
She brought a stuffed animal. Not a tiny little thing like some (young) women clip to their keychain. It was a gigantic blue rabbit at least as big as a toddler. She said she brought it because she sometimes gets scared in movies (we were seeing a comedy.)
After the movie, we grabbed some ice cream and drove the cousins home. My date invited me to kiss her at the door, but told me I should also kiss Pebbles (the rabbit) so he wouldn't be jealous.
Of course I kissed Pebbles. My date was actually out-of-my-league hot. But crazy.
Image by Andrew Martin from Pixabay
12. This happened under a bridge.
I was interested in this girl, and she kind of tricked me into a double date where she was dating another guy and had fixed me up with her sister. Being a good sport, I went along with it and it was awkward but okayish. But then she set me up with her sister again and this time it was just the two of us.
We went to the park. She had filled the trunk of her car with troll dolls (I mean dozens and dozens of them) and spent the entire date introducing me to her trolls one by one. (I should mention we were in our 20s.) She was getting frustrated and angry because I didn't seem all that interested in her dolls. So sitting there, hands full of troll dolls, she exasperatedly asks me "So are you going to kiss me or what? Do you even know how to kiss?"
"Umm, no I don't." I said, and got up and walked home. There's only so much one can endure while being polite.
Image by PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay
11. So wholesome.
Probably the 2nd date with my now wife. Some guy had paid me to get revenge on a buddy of his and wanted me to scatter a few hundred pounds of potatoes into his buddie's front yard. It was near where I was planning on taking my now wife and she said she would be cool with helping. So we drove to this guy's house, made sure he was not home, filled his yard and driveway with potatoes together then went on our date.
Pixabay
10. Meet the family from beyond.
I went on a date with a guy named Dan when I was in my late teens. Dan said "I'd like you to meet my father, he's going to love you."
So I got in the car and as we started heading out of town I asked where we were going and Dan said "you'll see, we're almost there."
15 minutes later we pull into a cemetery and he says to follow him. I was nervous as I followed him down a little hill and he kneeled down in front of a tombstone and said "Dad, meet my date, she's going to be my wife someday."
That was the first and last date Dan and I ever had.
9. It's a dangerous profession.
I have a bad habit of telling people I’m a mechanic too early into knowing them because I really enjoy it and I like talking about it. The last date I had involved about 20 minutes of us actually talking to each other about things like school, what books we’re reading, and video games. When we get to the part about what we do for a living, I tell her I’m a mechanic. She immediately drops all conversation and begs me to go fix her car right then and there. I’m a little too nice of a person and couldn’t say no at that moment, so we pay for our drinks and leave.
As soon as I see her car I know I made a mistake, it’s been recently wrecked and should not have been on the road. She then starts to tell me about how a friend of hers says it only needs a few repairs and it should be good to go, when in reality it probably should have been totaled with how bad the front end was caved in. I tell her this and she starts yelling at me saying I must not know what I’m doing, then says I need to fix it anyway and that she needs to borrow my car to go run some errands at 10:30 at night. I tell her no, and that I’ll call her a tow truck since I have AAA, and that I don’t think we’re going to work out. It’s been 3 weeks since then and I still get calls from her asking her what’s wrong with her car.
Pixabay
8. Seems like a great date.
On my first date with this girl, she took me to a life drawing class. Ok, no problem, I have no issue with nudity etc. So we get there, and the teacher gives her a big hug and says "Glad you could make it."
I thought, Aw that's nice. Then she stripped and got on the chair in the middle of the room. Ohhhhhhhh now I get it. We dated for 3 months and it was a blast but we weren't a match for each other.
7. They're mammals, you know.
So I went to a wedding once, and the groom set me up with this super hot Scandinavian bridesmaid. All is going well and we move outside on a beach under the stars. Lovely stuff. We start kissing, then she stops all of a sudden and asks, "What's your lifetime ambition?" Out of nowhere.
I don't have one. Certainly not one I can think of on demand, on a Norwegian beach. I told her it was a pretty deep question and I hadn't thought about it.
"Mine is to touch a whale" she said, excitedly.
"Err- that's unusual," I said, trying to get things back on track.
"No, listen, LISTEN. It's my lifetime ambition to touch the same whale TWICE. They are very intelligent animals and remember you. You are friends with a whale for life if you touch it twice."
Taken aback, I just grinned, thinking she was joking.
She wasn't. Instead, she got offended I didn't share her whale dream & walked back inside.
Pixabay
6. It's getting hot in here.
I had just gotten into college and was single so I couldn't wait to meet some girls there. I sat next to a really cool girl in German class, very outdoorsy, went camping a lot (which is awesome, I do too). On the last night of a project we were working on together I gathered the nerve to ask her out and she quickly said "SURE!". I pick her up the next night, and we go out to dinner. Everything is going great, had some good small talk, laughed quite a bit.
Then the food arrives. She immediately pulls out a bible from her purse and says we should recite a passage before eating. I'm an atheist but I really don't mind if a person is religious, I refuse to judge anyone on that basis alone. So we recite a verse, thank the lord for our meal, etc. As soon as I start eating the first question she asks is "Have you found a good church around here? I've been to a couple but I don't really like them." I froze like a deer in headlights. I've never been to church in my entire life so I have no clue as to what she would think is a 'good' church. After contemplating what to say for a second I decide to just tell her I'm an atheist. I mean, I don't care that she's religious and said a bible verse/prayer before the meal, so maybe she won't care i'm an atheist...right?
Not even close. She gives me this weird evil/astonished look. Immediately grabs her bible, flips through it for a second and starts quoting a passage about what happens to sinners. I knew I should have gotten up and left right away but I have an entire steak I just payed $25 for sitting in front of me. I hurry up and down the steak/potatoes/vegetables in about 10 minutes. During these 10 minutes she is STILL reciting passages talking about how I'm going to burn. I just nodded and continued inhaling my food.
As soon as I finished, I opened my wallet, pulled out a piece of paper with about 5 cab companies phone numbers on it, grabbed about $75 bucks, threw it on the table. The only thing I said to her was "that should be plenty of money to pay for dinner and get you a cab home." The next day she texted me and sort of apologized. By 'sort of' I mean the text read something like "I didn't mean to offend you but you need to recant your sins or spend eternity in flames." Next day I'm off to German class, wondering what may happen when I see her. Oddly enough, she wasn't there. Next day comes, not there again. I asked the professor if she had received word as to why she hadn't show up, and the teacher told me she had dropped the class the day before. That was a relief...
Now fast forward 4 years, and I'm a senior at a random bar near campus. And guess who is there totally wasted? Yep...it's good ole religious girl. I try to stay away from her but she spots me, runs up to me and hugs me...which I find very strange. I don't hold grudges so I hug her back. She buys me a drink I didn't ask for, but I accept it because I'm fairly broke. She damn near demands I drink it with her, so whatever I'll do it...I try to be a nice guy from time to time. Not more than 10 minutes later she says "we should go back to my place and hang out" while rubbing her hand up my thigh. I turn around, point to my girlfriend and say "See her, that's my girlfriend, and she has never cared that I'm an atheist. Thanks for the drink." Walked away, and never saw her again.
Pixabay
5. It's magic.
I'd been seeing this girl for a few weeks, and it wasn't exactly fireworks, but we got on all right, and it was the first time I'd actually tried dating someone after breaking up with my ex-fiancee, so I wasn't looking for a home run. She'd told me she was pagan at the outset and I assured her I didn't mind, as long as she didn't try to force it down my throat. For her part, she was true to her word, but it should've been a red flag from the word go. She tells me she's leaving town for the weekend to go to a pagan gathering a few towns over for the weekend and she was excited about it. For my part, I wanted to try to be supportive and non judgmental about her beliefs, so I offered to accompany her, but she said she'd be fine and would call me when she got home.
So I'm at home, playing internet video games in my underwear Sunday afternoon when I get a call from her (a day early) and she's panicked and sobbing on the other end, and it's only after much bleating and confusion that she's able to get out that she needs to see me ASAP. So I go full hero-boyfriend mode, immediately drop what I'm doing (I even put on pants!) and race over to her place thinking something awful has happened.
I burst through her door rapid-firing questions like "What's wrong?" "What happened?" "Who did this to you?" and "How can I help?" and she eventually tells me that she ran into an ex-boyfriend (also pagan) while at the convention, and that they'd slept together. I felt my gut drop out, then asked her if it had been non-consensual. She said no, she'd wanted to, then went on to explain herself:
Her: "See it's like this. I like you a lot and I don't want to hurt you, but you have to understand he POSSESSED me."
Me: "He...he what?"
Her: "He has a strong dark magic aura that I succumb to whenever he's around. He makes me not myself."
I'm pretty hopelessly lost at this point. I've tried to respect her beliefs up to this point but this is a bit of a tough pill for me to swallow. I tried to gain solid footing one last time.
Me: "Possession sounds like it was against your will. If that's the case, and we should go to the police department."
Her: "No no. It's just that the dark magic clouds my mind with desires."
Me: "...So, basically, you're openly admitting to me that you slept with another guy, and you're trying to rationalize it with something you know I don't believe in."
At this point she blew up on me. She was furious that I wasn't more sympathetic to her dark magic plight, and couldn't believe I could be so callous and selfish. After about ten minutes of cyclical yelling. I just turned to leave and told her to have a nice life. I'm not normally this witty, so you'll pardon me for including my snarky exit one liner. As I opened the door she screamed at me, "What, you don't even LIKE ME anymore?! Just ALL OF THE SUDDEN?!"
Calmly, I turned around, gave her a sarcastic grin and made jazz hands and said, "It's like magic." and then left.
4. Something to remember her by.
I went on a date that was arranged by the college newspaper where I was attending school. I had never met, nor seen the person who I would be courting that night. I was only told that all expenses would be paid for. I was a college student - how could I turn down free food? We met up at a local greek place while being followed by a film crew. She was great - charming, cute, funny, and could hold her own in a conversation. However, much like that exact lego piece that you really need in a tub full of legos, her crazy was well hidden.
After the meal we went for a long walk on the beach. A few minutes in she leans in close and whispers, "lets ditch the film crew". When a fairly hot girl asks you to find a way to get to a secluded place, logic is overtaken by hormones. The second they turned their heads we made a dash for it. We found a lifeguard tower that wasnt in use and made our way up the ramp. It was perfectly secluded, and it had the tactical advantage of being able to see if anyone was approaching. I leaned in a for a kiss, expecting that was what she wanted. She put a hand to my chest and held me back. "Wait," she said. She was excited at this point and she made no effort to hide it. "You want to see my scars?"
No biggie, I've had creepier things said to me and I figured it was an excuse she was making to eventually get us undressed. I was game, "sure...!"
She took off her shirt, not her bra - but it didnt matter as I was no longer facinated with her boobs. All across her stomach we DEEP, crazy scars that scored her abdomen like corduroy. Scars so deep they didn't just change the tone of the skin, but changed the underlying shape of it and how it flowed. "Want to give me one?"
"I... er what? What are these from?!"
"Memories. Give me one!"
She pulls out a hunting knife from her purse. The crazy was no longer hidden. She actually wanted me to cut her abdomen open.
"I've done it before, we'll just say that I fell while we were climbing the lifegaud tower."
"I... I think that the film crew found us."
They were a good fifty yards away and were oblivious to the fact that were were there. I stood up and waved, faked a blush like we were being naughty as this half-naked chick with a knife was hidden below me. She was not pleased, and had a knife. I was mentally saying goodbye to my currently not-stabbed body, and was praying it would stay that way. The cameras were on though, she knew she had to play nice lest her crazy be known to all. She hid the knife, stood up, and giggled. The date continued. We played laser tag. I elected not to give her my number at the end of the night.
Pixabay
3. The incredible catfish woman.
I went on a date with this girl from tinder. She "super liked" me and messaged first, so I was really happy to have someone interested. I asked if she'd like to go for a walk some time and she said she'd love to.
So we get to walking and like 5 minutes in, she asks if I have roommates. I said yes, I live with 5 people and tell her about a few of them. "Theres Max, Matt, Mark,..." "Wait, Mark Smith? I know him! What's he been up to..."
So we start chatting about my roommate and she knows a lot about him. His family, the sports he plays, his girlfriend. Every time I try to move the conversation somewhere else, she brings it back to Mark. She's not even pretending to be into me anymore, she's just fangirling out over my roommate. "I just love him, his hair is always so shiny and he smells so nice!" She spends the full 2 hours talking about him and asking all sorts of questions. I didn't really know what to do, so I just boredly keep answering.
When we get back to our cars, she shifts gears again. "Hey, so I had a really great time. Want to go back to your place to have some fun?" She's really creeping me out at this point, so I tell her I have homework to do and maybe later.
I get back and tell Mark about the date and he knows exactly who she is. He picks up his phone and immediately calls the police. They show up at the house find the girl outside in the back yard and arrest her for violating a restraining order or something.
It turned our she was super unstable and had stalked my roommate since they went on one date almost a year prior. She recognized me from photos she had of him and used me to find out where he lived.
2. This offer was easy to refuse.
So I've known this guy for almost a year now, not really good friends or anything, more of casual acquaintances (we have a bunch of common friends and see each other from time to time, parties etc). A couple of months ago he started messaging me, first on Facebook, then by text (he got my number from a friend, he didn't ask me for it) and most of the time I responded just to be polite. He's nice enough, but not really my type, so when he started dropping hints about 'meeting up', I just turned him down and said I'm busy, or we'd just catch up the next time there's a gathering with our friends, that sort of thing..
Fast-forward to last week and he asked me out again, which IIRC is the 6th time in the past 2 months. I finally decided to at least give him a chance, because hey what could go wrong anyway, and who knows what I'm missing and all that jazz. Worst-case scenario it would be awkward, but we've talked more than a few times so I was thinking it can't be that bad and we could actually have a pleasant time.
Date night comes and we meet up in the city after work. We have dinner; nice, cutesy Japanese place, conversation was okay. I was certain at this point that it's really not going to take off, he really isn't my type, but I was having a pleasant enough time and he was a total gentleman and not bad to talk to.
The bill comes, and I was going to suggest a quick coffee before heading home. However, he said that there's something he'd made an appointment for us for and we need to rush off to make it in time. I was a bit intrigued and excited; was it a movie, or a show, a play (he knows I'm into theater)? So we hurry off and he took me to a high-end luxury mall with an attached wing for offices.. we went up.. wait, this is an office lobby.. what the..
It was a weight-loss center.
So he explains that he's part of this company (he works for them on a part-time basis as a distributor) and he wanted to introduce me to their products which would 'revolutionize' my lifestyle and make the healthier I've ever been in my entire life. (FYI I'm 5'5" and 135lbs). I was totally stunned at this point so I was just nodding like an idiot the whole time we were walking inside. He then left me with his smarmy 'teammates', who proceeded to give me an orientation about their company and a run-through of their health supplements (when he got to the part where the weight-loss products are, the smarmiest one said, "Oooh now this is what you've been waiting for, I saved the best for last!")
I just sat through it because I knew that if I started to say something, I was definitely going to burst and make a spectacle of myself (there was a seminar ongoing and we were at a little table to the side). After I flat-out said that I'm not interested in any of the products and frankly don't believe that I need health supplements (I eat well and exercise regularly), they started on the 2nd phase: introducing me to the 'business' aspect of it. Basically, it was a networking model of business where you not only sell the products, you also recruit people to sell them and they would be under your 'team', and you get a commission for every sale they make. They rhapsodized about the wonders of the product, how easy it is to sell, and how much money I could be making because they could tell I have the right kind of 'personality' and 'network' for it. Registration was 'only' $1,000, and it was consumable in products... which I could either use or sell to get my registration money back immediately.
I wish I could say I flipped the table and told them off, but no. Right after the 'talk' I just said I should head home since it was getting a bit late.
The guy actually messaged me to say that he had a good time and he hopes to see me again, and that he hoped I would reconsider their products and the 'business opportunity'.
Brojid World
1. The kind of catch you throw back.
I went on a few dates with a guy in college. At first I was excited because I found him attractive and he said yes to a dinner date.
First date we go out to an Italian restaurant. He orders spaghetti with regular sauce, no meatballs. Out of curiosity ask if he's tried anything else on the menu he could recommend. "Nope, I only ever order spaghetti". Food comes and he proceeds to lean over his plate, shovel the spaghetti in his mouth and use his lips to cut the rest back on his plate. I'm no snob, I've eaten spaghetti like that before, just never in public. He says it's the right way to eat it.
He asks if I'd like to go see a movie. I'm not feeling the vibe so I decline, make up some project I need to finish. He tells me he loves the movies, wishes he could just live in one all the time. Uhm, alright, well, thanks for the date....
A week later he asks me out again. I decide to give him another shot, maybe I was being overly judgmental or petty. We agree to go out for pizza and see a movie.
I pick him up at his house and we go to Pizza Hut at his insistence, "best pizza on the planet" he tells me about three times on the way there. We get there and he orders a personal pan for himself. That was a first, okay he didn't want to share the bill maybe? I order one for myself and just let it go. Again worrying maybe I'm being judgy. Bill comes and he pays so now I'm really confused but whatever, I'm not going to call him out, not worth it.
"Movie" ended up being back his house where surprise! He lives with his parents. His dad asks me what I'm in school for and when I tell him he lectures me that I should go to school for teaching, since that's what he does. "Okay, nice meeting you." We never did watch the movie, spent the rest of the evening with him showing me all his WWF wrestling memorabilia and bossing his mother around Cartman style. His life goal was to get his old job at Blockbuster back since it was the most fun he'd ever have. His favorite way to spend Christmas was when his mom let him open everything the night before so he could spend the day at the movies, avoiding all the relatives that came over for Christmas dinner. He hated everything his mother cooked and counted off to me the only ten foods he would ever eat, hated everything else, didn't need to even try it.
Did I mention he was 27 years old?
A few days later he invites me out to coffee and I agree so I can tell him I won't be going on any more dates with him. He was nice enough, and even though he was an oddball, we never got each other to laugh. All our conversations were dry, no shared interests, and he didn't have the same values on the importance of family, this wasn't going to work.
We meet up and he orders a meal while I get my coffee. I tell him that I enjoyed our dates but wouldn't be seeing him again. He yells "so you're breaking up with me?!?" ...no, we're not anything official "I can't believe you're dumping me!!" And he storms out, leaving his food behind half eaten. I sit there for a few moments kind of stunned, slightly amused, but okay, life goes on.
A few weeks go by and now its the holidays. I run in to him again and this time we do hit it off. He seems to laugh easier, tells a good joke, etc. He asks what I'm doing for new years and I invite him to the party I was going to. I figure hey, maybe we can at least be friends. I tell him about the other girls that will be there and he seems to get the hint that we aren't going as a couple.
We get to the party and he loudly declares that he doesn't drink. That's fine, no one reacts, no biggie. He sits in the corner refusing to acknowledge anyone. He seems upset for some reason so I ask him what's wrong. He's upset because the movie trivia game we were playing earlier had a mistake in it. Uhm, alright, well we'll get the info off the box and write to them. He seems to cheer up after this. Later he sneaks into the kitchen and begins to prepare himself a "mixed" drink by pouring a little of everything into a glass. He doesn't notice me and he's talking to himself going "Yea a little of this, oooh maybe some of that " he takes a sip of his rumcranberrymalibudrpepperorangejuicemintschnapps with a splash of tap water (?) and pours the rest down the drain. I don't think he wanted to admit he didn't know how alcohol worked.
On the drive home the next morning he pretended to have a hangover and didn't talk much. I'm driving and the roads are icy so I'm not minding the silence. About 30 minutes left in the trip and he asks me what I want to do with my college degree. I tell him my plans and stuff I'm excited to do. He then says this "I don't see the point of you wasting your time getting a degree. You'll just be spending the rest of your life raising my children and cooking me meals that I like."
It took all I had not to dump him off right there on the freeway. He continues to say demeaning nonsense about our future, how he'll convince me to drop out of college, how pointless it is for all women to get degrees, blah blah blah. My ears began ringing with rage. I'd never had someone say anything so outrightly unsupportive or sexist like that to my face. I knew he had some strange social issues, maybe some anxiety about trying new things, but this was too much. I calmly told him I was not going to be told my lot in life is to raise his babies on his part time Blockbuster paycheck. I didn't say another word to him, just dropped him off at his car and drove off.
I did learn to never feel obligated to put up with someone's crap. I kept giving him chances when I shouldn't have, but in the end I think I needed to learn that lesson. now I'm really careful about not leading men on, especially if they have poor social skills.
